Deja Vu All OVer Again

Deja Vu All Over Again

At the age of 60 I was fairly sure I would no longer be awake in the middle of the night waiting for

a beloved family member to come home. After all my children are married and I no longer automatically wake up a few minutes before their curfews hoping to hear the familiar sounds of their cars slowing and pulling to a stop in front of the house and then the key in the lock. But I was wrong.  The other night when I could not sleep I heard Diva leave the bed and then go out the dog door. I did not hear her come back in. I listened, I tried to sleep, I told myself she was fine. I mean what could happen in the dog yard?  Plus she is a barker and I heard nothing. But that old worry tape began to play in my head and I knew I would have no peace until I got up and looked for her. Naturally, all was well and she was curled up in another favorite place wondering why I had turned the light on and disturbed her. I wish I could say that had always been the case with my children.

        

living with dogs

There are times that even though I technically live alone the fact that I share the home with two dogs can make me forget the alone part.  Especially when it is time to turn out the lights and go to sleep. The smaller dog is a burrower and likes to sleep under the covers. At least in the colder months.  In the warmer ones she sleeps in a dog bed in a closet alcove.  She also snores and produces a sound much larger than you would imagine from a dog her size. If I did not know better I would swear my second husband was in her place.  Of course I snore at times as well and cannot cast any stones! The larger dog likes to get as close to me as possible. I was going to say as “humanly” possible but that doesn’t quite fit the case in more than the obvious way.  This dog is often like a sack of sand lying against me, pulling the covers tight and making it difficult to move. Something she is loathe to do as well so that I feel pinned in place.  At other times her weight is just right and I almost feel as though another person is there in the bed. Without even trying these dogs provide a sense of comfort.

In the morning they make me think I am living with small children again.  Their internal clocks go off about the same time every morning and they are impatient for me to get up as well. The little one gets up and immediately goes out the dog door. Once she returns I can hear the click of her nails on the floor as she paces the hall hoping to drive me to distraction and subsequently out of the bed.  Her partner in this plan continues to lie next to me but periodically heaves great sighs of impatience.  There is no sleeping in.  Just like with toddlers.

And every dog owner knows how dogs make a routine homecoming feel like an event. Granted, they are also hoping for a treat but their welcome is genuine. Which I guess could also be compared to returning from a trip and having the kids clamor to see what you brought them. Except I can be gone for 15 minutes and get the same reaction.

And, of course, no meal is a solitary affair. I always have attentive company hanging on my every move if not my every word.

So yes I would have to say I live alone but not really.